sweat

I have not written in a few days because I have not felt well. Who am I kidding, I have not felt well in a very long time. The idea of the blog was to keep it positive and motivating because who wants to come to some strangers blog and find her a buzz kill. I USUALLY am positive and very uplifting but for the past several months there have been changes that I cannot explain. I don't sleep. It causes LOTS of problems. If affects everything. I know how to be healthy and what it takes to be healthy. Since becoming a coach I love to learn and read to try to help others. I know that feeling of needing help. Like I do again now. I went to my third dr again today . They took 10 vials of blood. This one is a hormone specialist. See, I am also bipolar and all of the sudden my pills stopped working. They used to help me sleep and feel better and then just stopped. So, thinking it might be hormones. I have thinning hair at the scalp too. Great right? I cry a lot and try SO hard to remain upbeat. I have lost my joy and really fighting to get it back. I am also trying to be a wife, mom and good coach but it hard. Being healthy? What a fight. I have had rapid weight gain too. Embarrassing to say the least. Lack of sleep and then I don't help. I can be super healthy for days and then go off the wall. I admit it. I don't try and hide it. I am trying to start from scratch with meds. Trying to see what the bloodwork with say (this time). One thing that has stayed a constant? Exercise. I know crazy. I feel good when I sweat. I get to escape for a moment. I may not always enjoy every moment, but I did today. After another terrible night I drug myself to hot yoga. Mostly I do my workouts at home but sometimes I need to get out. I needed it today. That is why I took the photo cause I felt like smiling. Don't worry I am not always a buzz kill. Even like I feel the world is against me I know God has this trial for a reason. I keep going right? As much as I want to give up I can't. Neither can you.