So here is the deal. I have insomnia. I am bipolar. Any one of them can sneak up on me at anytime. One might trigger the other. I get crabby. I get manic. I have not slept for 4 nights. Why? I don't know. Man I wish I did. I am tired. I want to cry. I try and stay as positive as possible. I am so transparent that you can tell when I am down. I won't pretend not to be. It took SO long to get here, I don't want it to go back to where it was. It is daunting.
BUT, how it used to be is different than how it is now. See, before, I never saw the "it would be better". I just stayed in despair. I would hide in bed, EAT, feel sorry for myself. Oh, don't worry, I feel a little sorry for myself, cause I want to sleep. Sleep is vital to our health and VERY vital to me. I want to feel like I did 5 days ago. Now though, I try to use tools to help me get better. 1. call my dr and find out what the heck is going on, again. 2. I exercise, better than medicine. I don't care how tired I am. 3. I pray and read something to lift me up. 3. I acknowledge and own it. 4. I realize I need to take a step back and take care of me before I can take care of others. 5. I. breathe because it will be OK.
It is what it is. Do the best you can. You are not alone. XO
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